The things that go on in my head…

So there’s a thing that happens when you know you’re being watched for membership in a polling order. Or at least it happened to me… and that thing is that whenever a member of that order asks you something, you feel like you’re being tested.

That feeling hasn’t come even close to wearing off yet. Whenever a Laurel asks me something, I want to prove how much I know. And at the same time I’m now in the position of evaluating others, and I want to do it in a way that doesn’t make them feel like they are under a microscope.

Or maybe I’m just weird.

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